Nyr's Greatest Hits

This is really a critical point in the "Anatomy of a Failed Producer". I've been involved with Arm (or was) now for a decade-plus. I've recruited dozens of friends and family to play over the years, some of whom still do. I've seen plenty of questionable calls staff-side, been on the bad end of them, and rolled with the punches. I've also staffed on other RP sites, and so have a certain sympathy for the difficulties involved. However, Nyr is perhaps a "perfect storm" of undesirable traits in leadership:

1) He is ubiquitous. He posts constantly. He "responds" (and I use the word loosely) to Player Requests prolifically. One of my family members actually started figuring out his daily routine by when he would get Nyr nasty-grams about specific events after the fact, and started playing in the windows of no-Nyr during the day. Suffice to say, the amount of time the man spends on Arm is frightening.

2) He is completely unable or unwilling to "check his ego". (Thanks to Anaiah, I believe, for that phrase in this thread.) If a staffer were ubiquitous, but solid in other regards, then it's a wonderful trait in a teammate. When paired with someone who can't be wrong, no matter what the evidence is, or admitting to a simple honest mistake, that same trait starts up a vicious synergy. Now you have someone who seems to be everywhere, both IC and OOC, who will never take responsibility for his part in any sort of error or misunderstanding. Seriously, if any of us conducted ourselves that way in the work-place, let alone with significant others or family, I doubt any of those relationships would last (or in the case of family, inevitably grow toxic if there's no chance of separation).

and

3) He's terribly clever. In the aforementioned role-playing site (actually the extensive forum for a LARP I founded and ran for three years), I had a player who was legitimately sharp and aggressive. Unfortunately, he believed that meant he was the smartest person in the room, no matter what. I'm afraid Nyr suffers from the same affliction: he seems to honestly and passionately believe he is smarter, better informed, more insightful, wiser, and a better person (more patient, more giving of his time, more magnanimous) then any player he comes into contact with. As one might imagine, that's a serious problem. It's a cognitive distortion so disruptive that it makes negotiation or conflict resolution extremely difficult, if not outright impossible. If my premise is "BastilleAngel knows best" from the outset of an issue, as opposed to "What is the best resolution for this situation for the game?", arriving at results that are beneficial to the Arm community as a whole (which I would argue should always be a Producer's aim) almost can't happen.

So, in summation, you have a ubiquitous person, who can't allow himself to be wrong, who assumes he is smarter/better informed than you, in the highest tier of authority for the game. Even Halaster at his worst didn't consistently hit all three of those (I would also note that Sanvean acted as a far more substantial "circuit-breaker" for Halaster's sometimes excesses than Adhira ever has for Nyr). Neither have any of the other problem staff that I'm aware of. Even Niamh could occasionally admit she had overlooked something, and that was at the height of acting as Nyr's personal echo-chamber.

* * *

There's probably a fourth variable in the equation I'm missing. And you know what? I'm fine with that, because I don't have to be right.

Anaiah, out of curiosity, how was Nyr's behavior toward the other staff? Or any other whilom staffers we have here: was his tone more civil? Did he ever concede a point? Even a genius isn't going to get it right 100% of the time, which Nyr is a far cry from. I'm just wondering if he's able to admit at least partial culpability under any circumstances, at any time.

I'm tempted to put up a particular exchange I had with him, which went to Big Daddy Morg, then back to Nyr. It "outs" me unmistakably, but seeing as I haven't played in several years, it's probably a moot point. It's the closest I've ever seen to an apology from him, except it didn't come from the man, the myth, the legend. It came via Morgenes, who has never been anything other than respectful and on-point with me.

Goddess, I yearn for the days of Sanvean/Halaster/Morg as the active Big Three. As has been noted before, Storyteller Nyr wasn't actually that bad. The Jekyll/Hyde thing happened later, as he rose through the ranks and become more and more insulated from any possible backlash.

He has a gigantic superiority complex. Armageddon is the platform that allows him to act out his disorder, and he has surrounded himself mostly with people who are similar to him or will let him be that way without objection. Sometimes people join staff who don't simply submit, and they're gone within a year. A great many of the players with backbone and principles have similarly been driven away, either leaving the game entirely or becoming detached outcasts like so many here who, even if they still play the game, do it in a kind of non-participatory or even actively contrary way.

The consequence is much the same as in a workplace with an abusive boss: the better personnel will start to seek elsewhere, or won't stay when hired, while those who remain are increasingly either too inexperienced to have better options, or just weak-willed and resigned to their situation. Eventually everyone in the office is one of those. Armageddon has lost nearly all of its best players, all the creative forces and talented writers. Almost all the players who could think for themselves, take initiative, and led the community. What's left, with a few exceptions, is bad players and dullards.

Notice also how departed staff never really stays on as player legends anymore? They used to do that all the time in the past. It seems that when someone has had close contact with Nyr, they usually get the hell away from Armageddon for good. This entire community is the result.

There have been some bad people in the past. For instance, Nessalin could be just as unpleasant as Nyr. However, I don't think there have been any others who genuinely seemed to have a full-blown personality disorder that they channeled through their position of authority. Nobody else has gone to these length to enthusiastically bully players, nobody else was so actively hostile. Nyr sits on the forum and just waits for opportunities to treat people like shit because he so clearly enjoys it, and needs it so much that it's usually completely unprovoked and out of proportion to what he's replying to. Hence this thread, and countless other remarkably similar stories about how he has been an enormous cock to people.

He's the most toxic person in the Arm community and he happens to preside over the game, giving him unopposable authority and power over it and everyone in it. This is also why I know nothing will happen until he himself finds some better outlet for his need to treat people like that, and to be honest, what could possibly be better than Armageddon? Even if he does leave, he has carefully surrounded himself with people who are either like him or sufficiently milquetoast to be pushed around and take it, so I don't see anyone who can turn things around. There would need to be some new candidate who's opposite to that, and we all know that such a person would either never get invited to join staff or would be shunted back out once Nyr finds out that they're not gonna be his creature.

For every such case, there's three instances of "I'm banning you and your wife's account because we think you're using the shadow board and we're too unpaid and volunteery to do any real fact-checking."

It's a toss up. Is it an apology and no staff position changes? Is there a new mission statement put out? A new guide to staff professionalism? A new stance on hrpts and rpts in general?

Okay then yeah, arm might get 50 more players. If they did all that. I'll say this short because cellphone

More players would return if change happened than people who would leave. Would any player quit if a staffer got fired? What about a return to old ways of handling plots? Think anyone will leave if there was a public apology?

There is overwhelming upside to such actions.