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Post by BitterFlashback on Feb 1, 2016 18:37:42 GMT -5
(Can I have my shadow card back now?) Hm, I can't see your card. There's just a message about how direct linking is not allowed. |
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dcdc
Shartist
Posts: 539
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Post by dcdc on Feb 1, 2016 18:54:47 GMT -5
OK....  |
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2016 18:56:45 GMT -5
The picture was working and then it stopped. Huh. Well, you'll just have to believe that it was an Official Shadow Card issued from the office of the Iron Throne.
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grumble
GDB Superstar
toxic shithead
Destroyer of Worlds
Posts: 1,619
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Post by grumble on Feb 1, 2016 19:05:09 GMT -5
I don't know, I have to be honest, I don't really know Malken, and it's hard to tell what's speculation and what's not. I hope some of you are wrong about him and his efforts turn out alright. He's always struck me as somewhat harmless, if naive.
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dcdc
Shartist
Posts: 539
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Post by dcdc on Feb 1, 2016 19:06:49 GMT -5
I don't know, I have to be honest, I don't really know Malken, and it's hard to tell what's speculation and what's not. I hope some of you are wrong about him and his efforts turn out alright. He's always struck me as somewhat harmless, if naive. YOU! SHADOW CARD! NAO! NOT WILD CARD ENOUGH. |
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Post by BitterFlashback on Feb 1, 2016 19:23:12 GMT -5
I don't know, I have to be honest, I don't really know Malken, and it's hard to tell what's speculation and what's not. I hope some of you are wrong about him and his efforts turn out alright. He's always struck me as somewhat harmless, if naive. YOU! SHADOW CARD! NAO! NOT WILD CARD ENOUGH. You're going to banhammer and make Armageddon pay for it, eh? |
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grumble
GDB Superstar
toxic shithead
Destroyer of Worlds
Posts: 1,619
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Post by grumble on Feb 1, 2016 20:47:32 GMT -5
I never got a shadowcard! I'm just a brownosing GDB shill sycophant, playing an elaborate ruse! Wait, shit, I'm not supposed to out my wicked plans like that!
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2016 20:51:07 GMT -5
I agree people should be generous with and courteous to one another. I dont think you tend to get this kind of social agreement outside of face to face relationships. My question back to, no offense intended, is: Has your participation in the group been worth whatever sharp edges or eccentricities you also bring with? Revisiting this question. Banme, look at my patterns pre-nyr and post-nyr. Something changed then, and sorry, but while I maybe could have done things differently, I really do not accept full responsibility for being made to feel defensive. Look at all the other people that Nyr shat on, and you might get the big picture. People seem to have tunnel vision sometimes. If you put a dick in charge of the game, the people he acts dickish to are going to grow defensive. unless they are ass kissers or weak, and then they will probably just go along with what he says. but not everyone is like that. sometimes, when people are stepped all over... they stick up for themselves. sometimes, that entails becoming defensive and calling BS when it's spotted. You will receive more courtesy if you display it yourself. |
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2016 20:57:19 GMT -5
i had never interacted with malken till he came over here because of nyr
the thing i took an issue with was him being a huge flaming douche when his feelings weren't as hurt anymore.
Well, i'm glad someone took the time to probably speak with him and calm him down... and you too, grumble. Nobody has ever apologized to a lot of people here, though, for problems stemming from nyr.
it's just like... they don't really care that he was a jerk to so many players. and not just a little jerk. a big jerk.
anyway, he just has that "us vs them" mentality... you see it in the way he was mocking this forum. and i mean, rewarding that sorta mindset just shows that other staff members have that mentality as well. to me anyway. maybe i am wrong. but it just makes me feel like it is keep going to be the same crap if more and more people have the "we're right, and you're wrong, because i said so" way of thinking about stuff.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2016 21:05:32 GMT -5
You guys have shadow cards? I want one.
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grumble
GDB Superstar
toxic shithead
Destroyer of Worlds
Posts: 1,619
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Post by grumble on Feb 1, 2016 21:14:56 GMT -5
I mean, I will say I've noticed a SIGNIFICANT change in their communications with me, giving me the benefit of the doubt and opening non-judgemental dialogue. Like, one time, there was an issue with a request I put in, and for brevety's sake, it didn't come out as politely as I'd intended it to. I know in the past staff has been quick to pounce on my ass, but with this, they just said, "This reads as a bit demanding in tone to me, I'm not sure if that's what you intended.", so I apologized and explained why it may have seemed this way, and that was that, we all got on with our business. If this keeps up, it could have an overall beneficial effect. I'm not going to try and blow smoke up your ass Kronibas, a lot of the issues that lead to some misunderstandings in the past have not gone away, and, as you've already noted, and as I've tried to explain as well, these problems are not unique to Armageddon, it's just a microcosm of a much larger toxicity that we, as a people, have indulged for too long and that needs correction. It's not going away overnight, but it's always good to see effort being put into fixing it, even if it's not as fast as any of us would like.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2016 21:23:41 GMT -5
@banme that is easy for you to say. hell, my spirit sorta broke when i saw multiple staff members seeming to not understand what nyr had done to make this place grow.
i probably shouldn't have gotten so upset over that, but i did. you obviously have an opinion of me already, but please tell me you at least see where i'm coming from:
i came here because of nyr being a jerk to not only me but many others. You seemed to defend him in a way earlier, saying that it's impossible to be nice via the internet all the time, that it's a dream and only limited to RL interactions. Well, that may be true, but there is the ordinary sorta internet indifference... and then there is being outright hateful to people you're supposed to be leading. i have been hateful... but not really to a large group of people that i'm *in charge of*... do you see?
i never really thought that i would be good at it, anyway, to my credit... and just because someone *thinks* they'll be good at it... doesn't mean they will be.
Anyway, after coming here because myself and others kept getting into it with nyr and others, i thought it would be better when he left. that was naive of me. i think the game is better off, but i also think staff probably unfairly judge people posting here. it's easy to forget that there was a very specific reason that many people started posting here, just like malken did.
When I saw staff being disparaging to this board, it felt to me like they didn't really understand why its use was necessary in the first place. I don't have the advantage of knowing anything about you, but I hope you understand what I'm saying here.
I have not been perfect with critiques, something that i fault with struggling IRL. i could have phrased a lot of things better and worded myself way better, with less negative enthusiasm and, uh, edginess... still, much of what has been discussed here holds merit. i hope some of you, in some way, agrees and understands, shortcomings aside. i really do.
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grumble
GDB Superstar
toxic shithead
Destroyer of Worlds
Posts: 1,619
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Post by grumble on Feb 1, 2016 21:24:53 GMT -5
So, instead of ramming their preconcieved notions down my throat, they spoke with me about it and made it clear, with language like, when you do this, this is how it makes me feel, and actually listened to my reply. Such conflict resolution skills are highly beneficial.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2016 21:27:50 GMT -5
grumble - I think it's very good that you're trying, and you really SHOULD feel good about it. I don't want to discourage you and I'm sorry if I have. Keep trying hard. You and I are in very similar situations right now, with me being penalized some with no federal funding, heh. but i realize how hard it can be to get along when you feel like people are against you. the way Arm works as a game sorta exacerbates that feeling of mistrust when you're dealing with a mostly anonymous collective, but if they are trying to show you that they are capable of sharing trust, then that's good. I think you should keep trying hard and do your best, though. You will feel better and feel better about yourself as a result.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Feb 1, 2016 21:34:56 GMT -5
even if i had the power to revoke your shadow card, grumble, i wouldn't: not for trying hard and putting forth a sincere effort, anyway... i wish i had the capacity to do the same at this juncture. i just don't think i am mentally strong enough to artfully navigate any sort of sensitive conflict resolution right now, though.
i still have my facebook turned off. just because i'm scared of what i will write. just in a bad spot. i'm glad you are mentally well enough to at least /try/ to put forth your best effort, though.
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